No, seriously. Ranma gets kidnapped to marry a BEAR (after repeatedly crossdressing and stripping naked). The Bear wants to make Ranma into a "real woman". This is accomplished by Ranma drinking the magic pearlescent white fluid that comes out of the Bear's flower. But Akane comes to save him! Then Ranma fights the Bear, changing from male to female repeatedly to signify his lack of decision, but finally defeats the Bear by ripping out the huge erect pillar that causes liquid to come flying out everywhere, totally destroying the Bear's Fortress Of Homosexual Delights. Then the Magic White Fluid No-Connotations-Here Flower melts away into nothingness as Ranma accepts the true joy of his love for Akane. But then, Shampoo shows up (in a Swiss Rescue outfit, the Freudian significance of which I scarcely dare guess at) to remind him of the joys of polyamoury, and they ski off into the sunset!
You know I'm right.
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